Mark and I have both felt affected by comments online recently, not necessarily ‘trolling’ but negative comments that just aren’t needed. I also know that we aren’t alone, as many people experience negativity online – it doesn’t matter who you are.
We’re very lucky that the people we interact with on a daily basis are all lovely and really build us up and support our blog. However, there are always going to be people that don’t support you and it’s hard to ignore their comments. These are some of the best ways we’ve found to deal with the negativity.
Talk about it
The other night, I saw a comment that really affected me and not in a nice way. So I immediately said to Mark “this has made me feel really shitty” and just by saying that Mark was able to talk to me about it and help me feel less shitty. Likewise if Mark sees something that affects him he’ll tell me and we’ll talk about it.
We’re very lucky that we blog together so we know what the other is on about, but it’s important to speak to people regardless of whether they’re in a similar position to you. If they care for you and they are there to listen, then that’s the main thing.
If I see anything that affects me negatively, then I close all of my social media and try to take my mind off of what’s bothered me. It’s always good to have a break from social media if you can, because it makes you understand that the words on the screen that have effected you can’t have the same effect if you don’t look at them.
Big picture it.
If something really affects me, and I can feel myself starting to spiral then I try to look at the big picture. I think about the person or people who have said the words that have hurt me, and I consider why they’ve made the comments. I consider that these people are different to me, and that’s okay. I’m happy with who I am as a person, and I shouldn’t let someone who doesn’t matter to me personally have an effect on me.
But I also want to say that I know it’s not that easy for everyone. There have been times where I’ve seen something and no matter how much it upsets me, I keep looking. Having been bullied when I was younger, I know first hand how hard it can be to just “ignore” someone’s words (especially for any young readers that might be reading this).
That’s why my top tip was to talk to people. If you share your feelings with someone you trust, even if they are unable to solve the problem it still means that you aren’t keeping the negativity to yourself. If you feel that you don’t have someone that you trust to talk to, then please feel free to comment below or if it’s a more private matter then please contact us using our email (can be found on our contact page) or our Instagram.
There is always going to be negativity, online and offline, but it’s about finding ways to deal with that negativity.